You’re sat on a packed commuter train at 8 in the morning. You’ve just launched your blog about one of the most personal things you’ve ever opened up about. You receive a message you wish you hadn’t opened. Billie Eilish- Ocean Eyes starts playing through your headphones as you’re looking out to sea and before you know it you’re ugly crying in front of a carriage full of strangers. I’m talking full blown, tears streaming down the face, silently staring out the window crying.
You’re all welcome to my pity party. If you don’t bring drinks and snacks you’re not getting in.
I’ve got more emotions running through me than a fourteen-year-old kid who’s just hit puberty. Think MySpace circa 2003 and you get the gist. A mixture of vulnerable and exhausted but at the same time feeling incredibly overwhelmed with the response to the introduction of Maybe, Baby?
I underestimated just how many people my blog would resonate with. Within minutes I was reading messages and comments from both men and women who are currently going through a similar situation or have previously experienced this. People who are further down the fertility journey than Morgan and I or only just starting out. Couples who defied the odds and conceived naturally and some couples using the wonder of science to help them along the way.
But what struck me was there was a common theme amongst all messages.
- This is definitely not something to be ashamed of.
- Whether you choose to share it with the world, keep it private, tell your closest friends or even just your pet dog you’re owning it in your own way.
- It’s perfectly ok to have a bad day. Actually, it’s expected. After all, this is a journey and there will bumps along the way. Some will be heartbreaking, some will change the direction you’re moving in, some will make you question whether it’s worth it at all.
Whether you can relate to the content of this blog or not please remember that you have no idea what the person next to you is going through. That ‘bad day’ could be caused by anything and the way you react can determine whether or not that persons day is made a little easier or a little harder.
Strength comes in many different forms and I’m incredibly proud of the people who found the courage to share their stories with me. I’ll say it loud and I’ll say it proud, fertility is not a taboo subject.
Oh and while I’m here, thank you to the woman on the train who gave me a face wipe and a sympathetic smile. Not all heroes wear capes.